Pagi 1/11 budak2 tersebut ada photoshoot, pre convo la konon. so I joined them. just to catch up with the long lost
I thought I was gonna cry in front of them at some point. luckily I didn't.
Lepas diorang dah siap pakai jubah, i watched them beratur depan tangga masjid. the faces, i see 4 years ago. a lot of stuff comes to mind. that time, there's this feeling, i'm not sure what, but there's something flows in me. and then I realized. It's PROUD. I'm so proud of them. seeing them make it to final year, and survived the struggle.
I don't feel resentment, or jealousy towards them. I know it's not my time yet. I'm just happy for them.
After the photoshoot, aku balik bilik.. just to get some rest or some work done. haram melagha je. kerja entah ke mana.. padahal 2 hari kemudian ada presentation.. hahahaha
Yeah, it comes to me when i'm alone. It hits me hard. I cried in my prayers. Asking God to make me stronger.
It should be me, laughing with them. wearing our robes, throw our hats, and jump in the air.. It should be me, lining up with them, walking on stage, and get my scroll.
I know I have to be strong. just another year to go. then, It'll be me. I'll make you guys proud of me. I will.
Dear Allah, please answer my prayers.
1 comment:
u'll make it. just believe in you and Allah, trust me.. that what im gain form last year.sometimes we didnt see what others see through us.but dont get rid the trust
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